An Open Letter to Pork Bacon
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Dear PORK Bacon,
Ahhhh, the other white meat. Some may be troubled by our love affair, and you know what, I’m ok with that. Many of my family and friends have abandoned you over the years and I bid them adieu and say, “Good reddens.” Others have tried to replace you; turkey and beef substitutes just wont due. You’ve kept it fresh and new, constantly re-inventing yourself. Applewood Smoked, Hickory Smoked, Maple Brown Sugar Cured, I love them all.
I like to prepare you a bed, covered with aluminum foil. Placing you side by side as I drizzle my Aunt’s syrup (Aunt Jemima) all over your body. Then I crack black pepper over your skin just for a little character. Out of a 375 degree oven, you look delectable. All I can say is nom nom nom *Cookie Monster voice* My Boo, the syrup is glistening all over your body. I say, the syrup is just glistening all over your body. You’re caramelized, salty, a bit sweet, smoky, and both meaty and crisp. What else can a man ask for?
I look forward to the time when I can enjoy you everyday, but for now and doctor’s order, I will consume you in moderation…meaning every other day and twice on Saturday.
With Love,
Me
18 Comments
LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!! Hi-lar-i-ous!
That was too funny
The commentary was awesome. I really wasn’t expecting the pictures when I scrolled but it made your feeling about bacon that much easier to understand…
TOO funny.
Feel free to send me some. My mouth just watered.
Never knew that one could find a relation between Fashion and Food but you have and it looks good, #sidenote hook a brotha up with some of that it looks delicious!
ick! but so good lol
You should be ashamed of yourself. LOL this almost sounded like Porn! (Good Porn might I add)
Dude you are too many things!!!!!! One the one hand I am smiling and laughing because I also enjoy food with a passion that is emotional, physical, and cerebral all at the same time. I also reject this preposterous propaganda perpetuated by Dr. Ian Smith and new blacks about how bad pork is. But then when I scroll down and see the pictures with the Aunt Jemima in the back ground, I can’t help but shake my head squint my face, tilt my head and say…really Apuje, really?!?!? All while LMAO. You have now made me hungry for some kind of something with Bacon on it!
Spec, I knew you would appreciate this post. Especially the way Aunt Irene and Pops be cooking.
LoL…..So funny….So serious…So right
HIGH-larious post! Your love affair with bacon is admirable.
I am MAD that you have the gourmet drizzle of syrup.
LMAO – I just fell out laughing…this is HILARIOUS bruh…absolutely HILARIOUS!
You are FAT! But it looks so good.
HAHAHA…. Did you eat all that meat (pause) Wheres the rest of the breakfast numba?? SMH… You a Fooooooooool!
[...] sidebar: If you’re wondering why PORK bacon, read his Open Letter to Pork Bacon [...]
LOL. This is absolutely hilarious. I actually wrote a note to my lover, bacon, last night as well. Wow. Great minds think similarly.
Your a mess for this one!